Gilded Lily Burlesque @ Windup Space Tonight

“I hate my girlfriend, she she she
Lies on the beach like a barrier reef.
Soaking up the stupid sun,
While the radio is blasting; fun, fun fun!

I don’t wanna be on the beach, no fun!”

The Dead Milkmen said it best (ahem) 25 years ago in Beach Song, and their words still ring true today. The Chop has seen enough oceans that they’re not really a draw anymore, and price-wise OC is comprable to the Bahamas, Mexico, or any number of more exotic resorts. Somehow crappy paintings, sexist t-shirts and sand sculptures of Jesus just aren’t as exciting as they used to be.

Ocean City does have one big redeeming quality in its favor though… namely beautiful women wearing next-to-nothing and acting scandalously.

Gilded Lily Burlesque makes you say 'What beach?' at the Windup Space Tonight. 8 pm doors.

What’s that you say? We don’t have to sit through Bay Bridge traffic, suffer sunburns and get sand in our shorts? We can see the ravishingly raunchy vixens of Gilded Lily Burlesque at the Windup Space instead? Sold. Done. Front row, suckers!

And just like yesterday, we’re in prime position to sneak over to Load of Fun and hit up day one of the Wild Style Reunion.

But we hope you all have fun with your Buffett cover bands and jellyfish stings.

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The Windup Space is at 10 W. North Ave.

Load of Fun is at 120 W. North Ave.

And yes, we are a little bitter we’re not at the beach, Ok?