Extraordinaires, Dangerous Ponies @ Charm City Art Space Tonight

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Updated: Secret Mountains is a last minute cancellation on this bill. They are being replaced by Hermit Thrushes.

You should listen to the Chop, Baltimore. You should listen to the Chop because we haven’t steered you wrong yet. You should listen to us because what we’re about to tell you will steer you very, very right. You need to go to the Charm City Art Space tonight, because there’s a pretty damn good show going on there. This is at least the best you’ll get in the month of November, and maybe for the rest of the year.

Philly has been demanding more and more attention lately, and while they’re putting out acts like Dangerous Ponies and the Extraordinaires, it’s not difficult to see why. Being friends and labelmates on Punk Rock Payroll, these two often share the stage, as well as sharing a fun, upbeat-yet-stripped down garage-pop sound reminiscent of the Black Lips, Jay Reatard, and the Vivian Girls.

"Dangerous Ponies play CCAS tonight. 7 pm Doors.

There’s not even a proper name for this sort of sub-genre, as ‘garage pop’ falls quite short for what these bands actually play, but whatever you want to call it, it’s a blast to listen to. These are the sort of bands that are happiest when they’re up on stage, to the point of being ecstatic, and remind you that they’re making music because it’s fun to make music.

While Dangerous Ponies and the Extraordinaires may be two sides of the same coin, Baltimore’s Secret Mountains is something different entirely. Don’t get us wrong; they’re plenty of fun to watch, but not quite in the same way. With a sound more reminiscent of Mazzy Star or Feist, Secret Mountains are enjoyable to see because you know you’re in on the ground floor, and watching one of this decade’s most talented bands before anyone else knows about them. Hearing these intricate melodies and full-bodied rhythms on the stage of a club or a DIY space is kind of akin to watching Brooks Robinson field grounders in Arkansas amateur ball… the talent is immediately obvious and overwhelming, and it goes without saying that this band’s star is going to be on the rise for many years to come.

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You know what else is a whole lot of fun? Voting for the Chop in the Sun’s Mobbies Contest, that’s what. There are only 3 days left to vote, and you can vote for us in 3 categories, Music/Nightlife, Misfits, and Personal. We’re going to need you to go vote right now since time is growing shorter and sadly, our trailing margin is not.

Free Stuff! Available on a Streetcorner Near You

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A friend once told us of a conversation he was having with an acquaintance of his who was from Glasgow. The two of them were walking down the street chit-chatting when they passed a set of fireplace tools; a poker, tongs, etc.

“What in the fuck is that?” asked the Scot.

“It’s a fireplace set.” said our friend.

“Well, I can see that, but what the fuck is it doing in the street?!”
Sensing a disconnect, our friend explained “Whoever owned it is done with it, but it’s still perfectly good, so they put it out here for someone to take.”

“That’s fucking amazing!” said the Scotchman. “In Glasgow you’d never see that in a million years. People keep their things forever, and if you put something like that out on the street the hooligans would snatch it up and beat someone to death with it.”

Failing a visit from the rag and bone man, putting your junk in the street is the next best thing.

This story has always stuck with us, and it reminds us of one of the things we like best about living in Baltimore: people put free stuff on the corner all the time. You never know when you may turn a corner on any given street and find an old video game console, a floor lamp, a small appliance or anything else that may prove useful.

Of course, there’s been something of an increase in this sort of thing since the indefinite hiatus of bulk trash collections. In certain Baltimore neighborhoods the night before bulk trash collection was a veritable community swap meet. As a downtown renter, the Chop was never too proud to walk around the neighborhood seeking treasure among the trash, and we even came up with a few quality items that served us well. We really, really wish that city hall could find the funds to reinstate bulk trash night. not just for this reason, but because it was a valuable service for city residents.

Then there’s the seedy underbelly of Baltimore thrift: the eviction pile. It is a degrading and humiliating experience to have a landlord turn you out of your own home, but what’s worse is having to solve the logistical problems of moving everything you own at a moment’s notice (and being flat broke at that moment). Most people evicted in Baltimore city are savvy enough to have someone standing by at all times in front of their house to watch over their possessions. But in any case, after a truck is secured and packed, most people will leave behind a pile of goods of at least some size. you’ve got to travel light, and anything you leave behind is the landlord’s problem, and fuck him.

The Chop has been on both sides of this phenomenon. We’ve never suffered eviction, but when we moved from the city back to the far suburbs, we knew we were going to have to travel light. With the TV packed and moved, the only entertainment on that last day in our apartment was to watch people root through and carry off our stuff. (Yes, there was a tranny hooker. And yes, we watched out the window as she rooted through the nightstand and put the leftover condoms in her purse. That happened. Stay classy, Baltimore.)

But we say all this now because we’ve finally acquired enough junk that our basement needs a thorough cleaning. Some of it may go to Goodwill. If we’re feeling industrious, some of it may find it’s way to the Baltimore Free Store. Some of the furniture may get consigned, and some items might be reserved for the Remington Dump.

Undoubtedly though, a few items are just going to be cast out on the street. Perhaps with a little sign that says ‘Free.’

Football Free Zones :Baltimore Bars With No TV’s

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There’s no denying it. Football is basically the new religion in America. The game once took a backseat to baseball, but ever since the 1994 MLB strike, the NFL has made huge gains in popularity and revenue every year, with no sign of slowing down anytime soon (unless they can’t resolve their own labor issues by next year).

We’ve had a hard time figuring out what to do with ourselves on Sundays lately, inasmuch as the entire city turns purple and shuts down. Non-football fans are pretty much free to walk around naked and rob banks on Sunday afternoons, since nobody’s paying attention anyway. By the same token, if you want to go to where people are, it can be nearly impossible to escape football.

Football and church have a lot in common. They both bore the Chop to death.

Even our humble Chophouse has its living room commandeered by Roommate and his girlfriend every Sunday, so the entire first floor is basically given over to football, takeout, and couch-sprawling. Since we can’t keep our house as a football free zone, and because staying upstairs with nothing else on TV only goes so far, by 7 or 8 we’re usually ready to break the dull monotony with a drink or two between a different set of walls.

Most bars use screen size and premium football channels as selling points to draw the crowds in, but for us, just the opposite will get us in the door. Here are a few of our favorite local spots which don’t have any televisions in the bar whatsoever. These are the kind of places where you have little choice but to talk to the person next to you at the bar. Or, you know, check the scores on your smartphone.

13.5% Wine Bar 1117 W. 36th St, Hampden. Sunday hours 1pm- ‘late’.

Bertha’s 734 S. Broadway, Fell’s Point. Sunday hours 11:30 am- 2am.

Club Charles 1724 N. Charles St., Station North. Sunday hours 6pm- 2 am.

Daugherty’s 223 W. Chase St, Mount Vernon. Sunday hours 12pm- 2 am.

Dionysus 8 E Preston St., Mount Vernon. Sunday hours 5pm-2am.

Hamilton Tavern 5517 Harford Rd, Hamilton. Sunday hours 4:30 pm- 2 am.

Holy Frijoles 908 W 36th St., Hampden. Sunday hours 12 pm- 10 pm.

McCabes 3845 Falls Rd., Hampden. Sunday Hours 11:30 am- 1:30 am.

Metropolitan 902 S. Charles St., Federal Hill. Sunday hours 8 am – 11 pm.

Red Maple 930 N. Charles St., Mount Vernon. Sunday hours 6 pm- 2 am.

These hours are only guidelines, but should be mostly accurate. If you’re looking for the Chop on a Sunday evening, odds are good you’ll find us in one of these spots. What about you, Baltimore? How do you beat the Sunday doldrums and fill the void, if not with football?

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Of course, voting for the Chop in the Baltimore Sun’s Mobbies contest is another great way to kill time on Sundays. We’re nominated in the Music/Nightlife, Misfits, and Personal categories, and we’re going to need your vote now to push us up into first in one of those categories.

Fundraiser Show to Benefit Current Gallery Today

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Well, we told you that charities, non-profits, and do-gooders of all types were about to come out of the woodwork raising funds as the holidays approach, and we were right. Fortunately, we’re in a giving and generous mood today, so we’re heading down to the new Current Space (421 N. Howard St.) to check out their new (ish) environs and support their endeavors by attending today’s benefit show.

Weekend afternoon shows used to be a pretty regular thing, back before punks and scenesters all started liking football. It’s a tradition we’d love to see reinstated, although today’s bill is more of a mini-Whartscape than a CBGB’s Sunday matinee. If you liked Whartscape this summer, but thought it was entirely too hot and crowded and stinky and confusing to go from place to place, then today’s show should be right up your alley.

Current Gallery holds a fundraiser today. 2-11 pm.

With 9 bands including Thrill Jockey labelmates Double Dagger and Thank You, the festivities also include several craft and rummage tables, as well as beers from the Brewer’s Art (No Natty Boh’s today, Hon.), and a chance to view the gallery’s current exhibition Force: On the Culture of Rape.

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We’re not going to force you to vote for the Chop in the Mobbies, but it is highly encouraged. We’re nominated in the Music/Nightlife, Misfits, and Personal categories, and we’re going to need your vote to push us over the top. You can and should vote daily from now until Nov. 12.

The Best Men’s Boots Under $200

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After a few fits and starts, it’s about to turn genuinely cold and gray here in Baltimore. Leaves are falling, rain is falling, and soon enough there may even be snow falling. Add that to the year-round hazards that pedestrians encounter on Charm City’s streets (glass, chicken bones, strip club flyers), and it’s clear that your stylish summer shoes just aren’t going to cut it anymore.

You need a pair of boots, Baltimore. But maybe you’re afraid to pull the trigger? You want something you could shovel a few inches of snow in, if it came to that, but they’ve also got to serve for everyday wear. Hell, you might even want to throw them on under a suit for the odd holiday party that’s bound to pop up. Clearly, not just any boots will do.

And you probably don’t want to spend a fortune either. Don’t worry, the Chop’s got you covered. We’ve scoured the net and narrowed it down to half a dozen solid choices, all of which are high on style, suited for winter wear, and at or below $200. It’s hard to go wrong with a basic black Chelsea boot, but when you want to step it up a bit, you might consider one of the following options:

Fratelli 8012. $99 at Zappos.com

Fratelli 8012

We’ve got kind of a love/hate relationship with zappos. You’ve got to look through a lot of crap to find anything that looks good, but once you do, it looks like this. These Fratelli’s are unconventional in a lot of ways. They’ve got buckles, which we’re not usually a fan of, they’re cut low on the ankle for what they are, and they’re blue (but available in 3 other colors). Somehow they pull it all together though. They may not be the ideal choice for everyday wear, but they’re definitely going to stand out. $99 at Zappos.com

Mataalii Wingtip boots: $150 at Aldo.

Mataalii wingtips

Wingtip boots are having a moment right now, and we’re all for it. Make sure you’ve got the stones to pull these off though, because they’ll be in your closet for years to come. Don’t worry about it; they’re definitely going to wear well with age, and after your first winter in them they’re going to look a lot less dandy and a lot more pedigreed, which is as it should be. $150 at Aldo

The Denver Boot: $160 at Banana Republic

The Denver Boot

We’ve got a soft spot for Banana Republic, and when they offer things like these boots, it’s not hard to see why. Their Denver boot is tough enough for most anything, and genteel enough for a garden party. Swap out cleats for the uppermost eyelets and hide a zipper inside the ankle, and they’ll even kick off easily if you happen to be lucky enough to escort someone home from said garden party. Now that’s good design. $160 at Banana Republic

Brinley cap toed boots. $185 at Johnston and Murphy.

Brinley cap toed boot

Perhaps you like the wingtip boots above but you’re not ready to commit to the style? A cap toed boot provides a nice middle ground. It’s every bit as classic, but not quite as ostentatious. Once you’ve outgrown your floppy old chukka boots, you may be ready for their grown up alternative. These particular boots are also refurbishable, which few shoes are nowadays (and even fewer under $200) So if you like them, you can literally keep them forever. $185 at Johnston and Murphy

Frye's Arkansas mid-lace boot. $198 at Macy's

Frye’s Arkansas mid-lace boots

If you’re planning to actually work in these boots (whether in the backyard or at an actual job), Then Frye’s got the boot for you. An American company with all the heritage and quality of a Red Wing or Carhartt, Frye’s Arkansas boots are a pretty rare find: a genuine, bona fide work boot that actually looks good enough to wear out on the town. They’re even made right here in the good old US of A. $198 at Macy’s.

Bed Stu 'Post' boots. $200 at Nordstrom.

Bed Stu ‘Post’ Boots

If Frye is something of a throwback, then perhaps Bed Stu is what we can get used to in the 21st century. A lot of talk about humble roots and honest work and good design and quality materials, from a bunch of Brooklyn hipsters who design in some charming old salvaged warehouse building in Bedford-Stuyvesant, but send those designs overseas to be produced and shipped back. Pair them up with an established national high end retailer who wants to foster something of an ‘artisan’ or ’boutique’ feel, and you’ve got fashion’s dominant business model moving forward. This may or may not be an overly jaded view, so we’ll put it aside and look at the boots themselves.

Yeah. Those are pretty fucking nice boots. $200 at Nordstrom’s

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There are no fashion or style categories in the Baltimore Sun’s Mobbies Contest, so you’re just going to have to vote for the Chop in those categories where we are nominated, namely Music/Nightlife, Personal, and Misfits. We’ve been holding our own thus far, but we’re going to need a hand if we want to crack one of those top spots. Head over there and vote now. We’d be much obliged.