Much in the same way that baseball is at its best during a pennant race and farmers’ markets come to life in Spring and Summer, so too does epically bad cinema reach its zenith in October. Sure, there’s plenty of groaners in b-movie history that focus on Summer camp and beach parties, and no shortage of Xmas cornballs, but it’s in the run-up to Halloween, when horror carries the day, that schlock film is at its awful best.
Tonight’s Mondo Baltimore at the Windup Space takes full advantage, opening once again with Baltimore horror-movie director Chris LaMartina’s Halloween Goodie Bag, featuring the bloodiest, gutsiest, and most horrorible scenes and shorts unearthed from Hollywood’s crypt at 7:00.
In addition the Best-Worst Costume Contest returns this year with a top prize of fifty (50) US dollars. What’s a best-worst costume? A tie and some spray tanner = John Boehner. A big fake mustache and a giant eye patch = Mr. Boh. A ravens jersey and a broken champagne bottle = Jacoby Jones. You get the idea.
Tonight’s feature is 1988’s Hack O Lantern, which Rotten Tomatoes describes thusly:
“Satanic antics and unnatural family relations abound in this twisted Halloween tale about a kindly old gent (Hy Pyke) who initiates his innocent grandson (Gregory Scott Cummins) into a devil-worshipping cult at a tender age, culminating in his induction as a full-fledged member in young adulthood. Despite what would seem to be a clear indication of the cult’s practices — including human sacrifices and perverse sex rituals — Cummins is strangely resistant to Grandpa’s suggestions that he commit a ritual murder himself in order to fulfill his destiny and become the group’s new leader. This may have something to do with the fact that Pyke is not actually the man’s grandfather but his true father, having slept with his own daughter in the hope of siring a worthy successor. Viewers who find these sorts of plot twists appealing will still be utterly confused by the last reel”. ~ Cavett Binion, Rov
So basically it’s kind of like Red State except they worship Satan instead of Jesus. And without all the allusions to Waco and Ruby Ridge. And more perverted sexytime. Anyway, a similar group to Mondo Balto based in Athens GA cut a trailer for it which you can see above to get the idea.
And if that weren’t enough, Mondo Baltimore now features post-show karaoke. Horrible films and horrible singing! what more could you ask for?