Update: Presumably because of the water main break and the extreme heat and the generally shitty state of affairs in Baltimore City this has been postponed until August 15. Not exactly a banner endosement for living and working downtown, but that’s a matter for another time. Hey...

Good news everyone! In a thousand years most of you pathetic jerkbags will be ancient wormfood. And do you know what happens to ancient wormfood? (Hint: it involves the Slurm Queen’s cloaca.) But that’s not really news, is it? You already knew you were boned. The good news is that...

Today is the fourth of July. We’re pulling the blog into port and going ashore for a day off. Happy...

No power means no blog posts. Sorry kids. We’re sleeping on the balcony and living off of pizza and Chinese food and being bored and sweaty and miserable until the power comes on again. In a week or a month or...

Dave Tedder died suddenly last week. While I wasn’t especially close to Tedder, I’ve known him for more than half my life at this point. I’m sad to see him go. I always expected Tedder would be off for good someday, but not like this. He was a dude you naturally assumed...

Once upon a time, we mocked and derided Twitter mercilessly. Then we got a blog and joined Twitter and realized that OH! this is actually pretty awesome. Not only does it drive blog traffic, but it lets us know about almost everything way before everyone else- from a simple traffic jam to the...

Happy Facebook Day everybody! This post is being published at 7:00 am, and odds are that even at this early hour you’re already completely sick of hearing about Facebook’s IPO and how they have a billion users and are worth a trillion dollars etc etc etc. We’ve certainly got...

Well, here we are at the end of the year. The holidays are well nigh and everyone is busy buying gifts, planning parties, eating, drinking, making merry, and of course, looking back and taking stock of the past year. Yes, looking back and taking stock is one of America’s favorite holiday...

Today, Baltimore, the 28th of October, is a day of tremendous moment and importance. It’s a big red letter day for us, because exactly one year ago today we launched our humble little blog with this post about the Office of Future Plans at the Sidebar. Now that we’ve turned 30, a...

“Ah yes, here I am, far away from everyone And the only fish I smell Is on the deck of my boat. I’ll steal some gas, fix my motor Put on my Doors tape And get you out of my head!” If you’re looking for the Chop in town today, don’t bother. We chartered a boat and...

We were really torn on what to do tonight Baltimore. You seem to have left us high and dry this time. What’s doing tonight? Go down to the stadium and watch the O’s lose again? Go to that dull little Honfest concert thing? Go fill up on grape leaves and ouzo with the Greeks? Nope....

As you probably already know, many area Catholic schools are slated to close due to ‘budget issues’. We’re going to reserve any comment on the Church as a whole, and instead stick to what we know best. We have very mixed feelings, to say the least. Although the Chop is...

If there’s one thing the Chop loves, its beer. And if there’s one thing the Chop loves more than beer, it’s beer in a garden! A garden of beer! We saw our first proper beer garden at the tender age of five, as it was a cornerstone of the Chop’s annual Catholic School...

That’s right Baltimore. Its the distant future. Right now! Today! It must be the distant future, because we clearly remember being a wee little Chop in the Reagan era and doing the math. We were born in 1980, so In 1990 we’ll be ten, and in the fifth grade with Sister Joan. In the...

Sigh. Today the Chop doffs our cap one last time to a Baltimorean we well admire; Brian Dubin. He’s off to Japan as of today. What’s he doing there? Who knows. We’ve been gone, you know, and each year that goes by we fall more and more into the trap of allowing internet...